As seen on TV eventually, Jessica Smells™ candles represent the future of luxury. Once enjoyed only by queens of foreign lands, they are now available to the average ten-dollar-having consumer.
These candles are locally crafted by some wonderful people whose services are very expensive. By purchasing one of these candles, you are helping us pay off the immense debt we owe to our candle manufacturer. Please buy one.
Jessica Smells™ Boyfriend candle
Jessica Smells™ candles are made of 100% real Jessica (and also soy). This scent is also made with the drool collected from Jessica's Boyfriend's various naps. He doesn't know about this. Please do not tell him. The drool was probably Jessica's to begin with anyway.
Scent: Ice Cream Parlor
Heather, if you're reading this, we will have the money soon. Please give us more time.